If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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