I don't think brook has ever known best
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
He gave me a promise ring. He promised that he will imagine me as every girl he fucks in college.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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