just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
