you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
I was going to learn how to knit but I got high instead.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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