Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Randomize