***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
Standing in my kitchen eating choc chip cookie batter from the bowl. As sad as it is, I kinda like the places bad breakups take me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
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