Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
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