i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Woke up and took my pants off only to realize that I was wearing my shirt from last night as my underwear
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Randomize
