you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
we got her to the bathroom intime. all she could say was 'now my bladder is empty just like my soul'
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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