now i know why i became what i already was.
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
They ran out of vodka so we started doing Body Doritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They finally caught us and banned us forever, but it was worth it because we didn't have to pay for light bulbs for at least 3 years.
So you stole light bulbs, from your favorite bar, and got banned, and you're happy?
Look we couldnt pay for light bulbs and ramen, and you can't eat light bulbs or cook in the dark. Win - win.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Do you ever look back on your life and think - man I should have never had sex with that guy
my god I love twenty year old dicks
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
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