Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
I'm gunna wear a purple dress, so if you see someone looking confused and lost wearing purple it's probably me
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize