im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Idk how much vodka is on these pants but I'm gonna wear them anyway: the biopic
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
yeah i'm making him "thanks for letting me befriend your toilet" cookies. wanna help? i'm sure you'll be making new friends too.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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