R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
I really wanted you to make me eggs this afternoon. I even wrote it on my hand to remind myself.
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