Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I dreamt Michael Jackson dropped his pants in front of me and I had to ignore it.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Ur gonna wake up early as dick tomorrow to do some responsible shit but im the one up at 3 am right now cooking brats soaked in keystone light so fuck your falling asleep ass bitch
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
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