i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
My hand turned me down
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Why can't burritos get me drunk
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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