I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
No no, there's drunk and then there's 'spooning with lawn gnomes' drunk.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
