thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
so the plumber came, he found condoms, feathers and glitter in the pipes.
He was standing in the front door with a kareoke machine yelling at the neighbors as the unloaded their van
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
Hung out near hay bales in sweaters then she gave me a pumpkin spice pop rocks bj. That was so freakin' seasonal.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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