I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
im gonna make a bucket list just so i can cross off "underwater blowjob"
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
tell me about the eggs
So, I can officially cross "getting eaten out in a church confession booth" off my bucket list.
Randomize
