I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
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the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
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WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
no one ever believes me when I try explaining to them that your straight. I'm all like, "yeah that's his girlfriends dress he's stretching out"
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
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