I think i sorta joined a cult last night
I just woke up and realized I puked in my boxers WTF.
You stay classy.
The worst part was I forgot until I tried to put them on.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
