I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
