dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Randomize
