idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
