That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
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I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
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The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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