Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
Randomize
