Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I fully support your bad decision but I do not approve of your unironic use of the word yolo
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Randomize
