Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Just remembered I hit myself in the face with a bottle then did the nose test and decided I was still good. Don't think anyone noticed.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize