what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
