I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
