Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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