my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
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