All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
after he passed out we removed everything electronic from his room, stuck in some old books and an ancient typewriter from goodwill. for 20 min. we had him convinced he'd drunk himself backward in time.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
I just imagined your drunkass eating Taco Bell in my living room. This is the Godmother of my potential child.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
the ball fondling will be left out of the trip recanting
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
New plan for Halloween: you dress as Waldo, I'll dress as Carmen San Diego. We can just hide in a closet drinking till someone finds us.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
Randomize
