Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
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