you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I remember looking at his body and thinking wow you have a body sculpted by Jesus himself. Still not sure if I said that out loud or not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Never let your siblings swipe right.
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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