I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
In case you come back to the room and i'm not here, yes there's a cup filled with gravy in the microwave. Just take it out if you need to heat something.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
Can I get a "hallelujah" for railing my pastors daughter last night?
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Just saw 1 guy dressed as a cow and another dressed as a shrimp dancing on the side of the road. We're turning around I NEED to dance with them.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize
