I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
ever had your bank call you to verify the 4 seperate bar transactions from the night before? I have
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
you were passed out so I asked you what my name was and you opened your eyes and yelled "ricotta cheese"
no way
that's when i decided you were gonna be okay
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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