32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
I'm never drinking with you again. I woke up in Midtown with a 7' tall Norwegian rugby player named Lexie. Never. Again.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Randomize
