The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i just saw a woman using her birth control packet as a wallet.
coulda been worse. everyone in the drunk tank got free mcdonalds breakfast
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he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
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He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
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