Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
Blood and glitter go together right?
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
I'm a hopeless romantic with the sex drive of a married politician. IM DOOMED.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
Randomize
