if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Asking the homeless man what buss shelter is the warmest was not a good idea
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Randomize