What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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