Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
I want an alcoholic time machine so we could skip to new years eve
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
If I didn't have booty calls, my apartment would never get clean
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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