i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
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