i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
