But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize