Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
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Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I still hate everything and everyone around me. Krampus taught me nothing.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
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