She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
There were midgets. And vodka. If you don't appreciate the awesomeness of that sentence, read it again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
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