Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
I'm just impressed that you can puke without losing your gum
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
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