apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I don't think my ego could take a straight man out-cooking me.
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
Practice the "sorry I may have given you herpes" conversation with me before I call him and break the news
you wanted the guy to gift wrap the condoms
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
Randomize