I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
we made out on top of his cat.
Hard to imagine a reason apart from blow jobs that I'm awake at 530 am.
I think you blew it when you asked her "Do you look good naked too, Or is it just the bra?"
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
