You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Turns out dignity is priceless and Plan B costs $41.09
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