well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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